I care by Anonymous

Crowds say I am heartless, for being ignorant, 

for avoiding the troubles 

that surround me like shadows. 

But the truth is I care more than anyone here dares to show. I run from the pain 

because I cannot bear to face it. 

My heart aches at thesight of my mother’s cries, 

my sister’s yells, 

my father’s dark, rageful nights. 

And yet, before all, 

I would fall before them 

choose my own demise 

before witnessing theirs. 

Because my soul would not heal from a break so vast 

as to watch them disappear, the light fade from their eyes, their rooms left empty, 

their presence forgotten by all except me. 

Because I 

could never forget. 

So let’s be frank, 

you call me heartless 

because I turn away, 

but you have never felt 

a heart so full 

it chooses blindness 

just to keep from breaking. 

I do not lack love 

I am drowning in it.

And if I must measure worth, know this 

my existence is not even worth ten-thousandth of theirs 

and still, 

I stay, 

quietly breaking, 

so they don’t have to.